are you a liar?


Are you a liar?

I’ve been a liar. Not often but sometimes. In real life less than in blogging life!

 

Do you lie saying like “that’s a brilliant photograph!” even if it’s bad?

 

I’ve done that. I didn’t want to but

didn’t find any other words at the moment… I felt sorry for her/him…

I felt bad and stupid after that…

 

Do you agree with  a blogger even if you disagree with him/her?

 

Usually I say what I think if asked.

 

Why do we, especially women, want to agree even if it’s not true? Why do we lie?

 

Would it be better just to leave a blog and say nothing?

 

Why do we support something which is against our own thoughts even if we would not agree in real life?

 

Why do we flatter?

Has somebody asked us to flatter each others?

Or is flattering easiest way to say something when there’s nothing else to say?

 

I’m curious. Tell me what you think!

 

 


 

abstract by BLOGitse

 

Why do you lie?

Why is it difficult to be honest – or is it difficult?

 

 


 

 

0 thoughts on “are you a liar?”

  1. It totally depends on the person / blog.
    I either say nothing, or I say something nice about the photo (with any photo there’s usually something nice to be found) and I also remember my first photos on flickr 🙂
    I wouldn’t call it lying.
    Before I lie I rather say nothing and leave.

    Reply
      • If quality sucks but a person (commenter) says ‘amazing’. Or then a person is blind.
        I mean bad quality and no mention why it’s bad.
        I don’t mean bad quality when it’s mentioned. I don’t mean that pictures should be perfect, artistic, pro etc. just ordinary shots which are bad.
        I guess most of the people want to be polite. But I don’t understand why to lie or amaze when there’s nothing to amaze.
        I’m sure you know what I mean……………..

    • I wonder how people who never get critique can take it if they asked for it?
      You’re right, there’s a nice way to say things but most of us say nothing. Silence is difficult to read, understand if a blogger doesn’t realize what the problem is……

      Reply
  2. hello! i love that you are writing about this just now. i am still trying to understand the blog world and one of the first things i noticed was how everyone always says “nice photo!” on many of the photo blogs without even taking a real second to look at the content. this is very popular with the blogs that do the hops and exchange links. when i started writing again, i got caught up in that too since i didn’t know how to find a community but i learned that will time, you will find the readers that naturally are into your stuff. so to answer your question, i lie too and have found myself doing so on other people’s blog. and like you, i feel sick for doing it afterward. and i agree, women flatter so much more than men. why is that?!?!

    Reply
    • Why women flatter so much – because we want to be liked, loved. Flattering is one way to get love. But how real that kind of love is….hm…
      I think we women are not as innocent as we ‘look’. This is not a lie! 🙂

      Reply
  3. Interesting subject!
    I’d say that I try to polite and nice, yes. I feel like if I can make someone feels good with what I type then it’s great, it doesn’t mean that I’m not sincere. If the subject is too strong to my liking then I won’t say anything. If the picture is really bad then I’d rather not comment too 😀

    Reply
    • Interesting indeed!
      Most of the commenters say they are polite or say nothing. But nobody has said why they say ‘good, amazing etc.’ even if the content is poor or bad?
      Is our imagination so bad ‘good, amazing etc.’ are only ways to leave a comment, are we in hurry – are we really interested what others are posting?

      Reply
  4. So, my girl friend says, “Does this dress make my butt look big?” A simple ‘yes’would be the death of me. So, I say: “Yes, and it’s really turning me on!”

    Reply
  5. Hyvä kysymys. Lepis sen jo sanoikin, rehellinen ja kohtelias mielipide on paras vaihtoehto tai sitten ei mitään. Kaikkihan ne voi tavallaan ‘loukata’, riippuen kirjoittajan tai kuvaajan tavasta ottaa palautetta vastaan. Liian hyvää saatetaan pitää mielistelynä, eriävää kritiikkinä, jotain muuta aiheen vierestä jne jne. ja monella voi rehellisestikin sanottuna olla aivan erilaisia mielipiteitä kukin makunsa mukaan. Aina ei edes ole mitään sanottavaa vaikka olisi kunka hyvä kuva, ei vaan ilkeä enää toistaa ‘upea kuva’- sanomaa.
    Niin ja hiljaisuus, se voi olla myös ajan puutetta. Tuli mieleen sekin, kun olen yrittänyt kommentoida tänne jo ainakin kolme kertaa ja joka kerta joku tulee keskeyttämään olevinaan kiireellisen asian kanssa… uh, nyt se onnistui!
    Sori, en jaksa vääntää huonolla ja hitaalla englannillani.

    Reply
    • Suomen kieli on hyva kieli! 🙂
      Tanaan juuri kavin yhdessa blogissa jonka kirjoittaja oli saanut anonyymilta ilkean kommentin. Miksi? heraa kysymys. No. Yksi vastaus on etta meita on moneen junaan. Jollain ihmisella saattaa olla tarve purkautua syyttoman ihmisen blogissa. Onhan noita vihaviesteja ja todella torkeita kirjoituksia nahty monella suomalaisellakin forumilla.
      Hyvin sanoit hiljaisuudesta. Olen kokenut ihmisten ajan puutteen hiljaisuutena – ei tule sahkopostia vaikka kuinka odotan! 🙂
      Itse yritan bloggailla silloin kun mies ei ole kotona tai tekee omia juttujaan. Ajatus katoaa jos pitaisi keskittya kirjoittamiseen ja kuuntelemiseen yhta aikaa! 🙂

      Reply
  6. I must admit having used “white lies” several times in my real life. If I don’t like a photograph, I’d prefer saying nothing. If I’m asked to comment, I might perhaps use “interesting”. I don’t want to hurt anybody.

    Reply
  7. I would think bloggers posting creative work, in whatever medium, would appreciate honest opinion or critique. The effort to be creative can always be affirmed, even if one doesn’t care for the direction or subject of the work. When photographers post several photos, I usually pick the one that I think is best and say that. Honesty does not have to be expressed in unkind ways that discourage the spirit of the person. I see more cruel commenting on Youtube than on blog sites.

    Reply
    • Recently I visited one blog where the latest post was just photographs and most of them bad quality. I don’t have heart to say ‘most of your pics are not sharp enough’ even if it’s true. If they are good for her/him they should be enough for me and it’s not my blog. What I don’t understand are people who comment ‘great shots’, ‘amazing pictures’ etc. They either lie or they need glasses.
      I’ve seen cruel commenting on YouTube too…

      Reply
  8. Why do husbands feel afraid to tell their wives they’ve gained weight or look wrinkled. Perhaps because they are scared of the consequences of telling the truth. Many women don’t want to be told they look bad or aren’t as good at something as they hope they were. That’s why husbands don’t want to tell the truth. Their wife will never forget. Not even after 20 years of marriage. If you want the truth, I think you have to ask your best, and most trusting childhood friend. That’s what I do.

    Reply
    • Why are we like that? We all – men and women – get older and not look the same as twenty yrs ago. That’s a fact.
      Why are we so sensitive with that?
      I KNOW and I can SEE that my body is not the same what it was twenty yrs ago. We have talked about my and my hubby’s bodies – talked and realized how we are not the same. That’s it. When I met my hubby he was almost skinny. Now he’s normal, not fat but not skinny, normal. Our love, relationship is not based how we look. More important is how we feel in our bodies than how we look. If we don’t feel good we do something about it.
      As long as girls are raised as princesses, to be girly girls, they will face the same problems with their self-image. Parents are role models. In good and bad.

      Reply
  9. not that we don’t have feelings but women are more focused on feelings than men. I’ve had a few comments that disagreed but then I don’t post controversial subjects.

    Your graphic – nice colors but I think the shapes lack imagination. Is it meant to be a thinking gear?

    I would rather get a polite negative comment than no comment. We can disagree and not be rude.

    Reply
    • Why women are more feeling focused? Or is that we use that word too much?
      I’ve met several rude women but not following them anymore. Competition is hard…….
      My image is just an image. It’s a ‘wheel'(3D button) in SumoPaint… 🙂 not meant to be more than just a picture…

      Reply
  10. Eek! People lie about whether or not they like a photograph? If I like something I say so, if I don’t, I just move on. I’ve never run into anything overtly offensive or damaging so don’t feel bad adopting that strategy. I think Lepis has a good policy, be “honest and polite.” That’s a good tone no matter what. In the end, I think your heart is certainly in the right place if you take pains not to hurt somebody’s feelings.

    Reply
    • eeek! yes they do! I’ve said a couple of times that a picture is nice or similar even if it was bad. Because that’s what everybody else said.
      Now I know how not to lie but be polite! 🙂
      Maybe lying is too strong word? Is white lie better?
      There’s a huge issue in Finland now about “anger writing” on internet….

      Reply
  11. I’m too honest person to lie in blogs. If I don’t know the blog after long period of time, I leave without a word. If I’m familiar with the blog and know the writer will not get off, I tell my point of view. Even if it is totally different from the writer. But, the way to do it is the point. There are always someting nice even in the worst of them. So, be honest and polite.

    At least that’s what I’m aiming to do!

    Reply
    • ‘Be honest and polite’ – that’s great!
      Sometimes, without any reason, I notice sometimes commenters who just want to answer back, they want to be mean or want to misunderstand what’s written.
      I wonder why that happens…We, women, are not that nice and kind after all? (as we are brought up – to be nice and kind)

      Reply
  12. Well, I have been sometimes that kind of a liar too, but not completely.If I think a picture is really horrible,I rather not say anything…Flattery,that is something that is quite difficult for us Finns,but easier in other cultures.

    Reply
    • Yaelian, I’ve seen a lot of Finns writing flattering comments. Especially women – me too! – we write like we used to when young girls. Sometimes even baby talk. 🙂

      Reply

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